


No Tears to Shed

by FalloutThoughts



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Hurt angst and comfort, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-04
Updated: 2016-07-04
Packaged: 2018-07-19 23:26:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7381735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FalloutThoughts/pseuds/FalloutThoughts
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>DiMA suffers from memories of the Institute and Nick lends him an ear.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Tears to Shed

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Mothtrap](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mothtrap/gifts).



“I’m fine.”

If there were ever words that screamed ‘I am anything BUT fine’, those were them. 

His tone was carefully calm however and he made no move to rush off. He would have had a job to – between the experiment they had undertaken and the multitude of wires and cables they’d needed he’d managed to get himself completely ensnared to the chair. 

Faraday uttered with irritance to himself about various things he should have thought of or what he should try next time whilst untangling him carefully.

Thanking him DiMA left him to his work and ascended through the building. He felt a sudden need to be outside in the open. It was peaceful there, upon the mountain top. They rarely saw trouble and the occasional bird he saw made him wonder what it might be like to soar through the clouds. 

It would take time to settle though. If he had a heart it would be pounding loudly within his chest.

The sound of someone clearing their throat behind him drew his attention and he blinked finding Nick walking towards him. A hand lay upon his shoulder and he frowned with light confusion. 

“You alright?” the detective asked already aware of the answer. 

“I’m.. I’m fine, Nick,” he heard himself repeating those words again but he didn’t know what else to say. He wasn’t in any danger.. just.. 

“You sure about that? ‘Cus you seemed pretty worked up about somethin’ back there.”

Nick regarded his counterpart watching his eyes move, unable to decide on a single point to focus on. Robots could not shed tears, but he knew the sound of them in a person’s voice when they spoke. He knew the shuttered look in someone’s eyes when a pain or fear was too much to bear. And he knew that he had never heard DiMA give a short answer to anyone before. 

“I-.. ….”

“It’s alright if you don’t want to talk about it just yet. But I think it might help if you try to.”

Of course Nick would be the one best able to read his features.. He shared them after all. DiMA finally lifted his gaze to meet the others. He didn’t like to trouble people with his own problems and usually a smile was enough to convince them that there was nothing out of the ordinary. 

But not this time. 

He allowed the mask to drop, his frown more evident as he felt himself drawn forward into Nick’s arms. Strange that he was being held here too by frames of metal and wire but unlike in the chair here he felt warm. 

He felt safe.. 

His head bowed to touch his shoulder. He hadn’t noticed himself until now but his body had begun to shake a few moments ago – the prompt that had Nick reach out to embrace him. 

Inside his senses burned, like cracking glass and frayed wires. There was nowhere for the terrible feeling to go and he just wanted for it to be out of him.  
So he began to speak.

It didn’t really matter that there was no introduction to the subject or order to his words. It didn’t matter if it made any sense on an audio level he just needed it to be out. Needed it to leave. And Nick was there to listen. 

“They would.. tie us down.. Sometimes for days.. Pull bits of wire and data chips from our heads.. Put others in..”

“Was it painful?” 

He honestly couldn’t remember. Any time spent in the Institute was a giant blur to him at this point. He remembers being watched.. a room of complete isolation but little else beyond too white walls and the occasional smell of solder.

“Sometimes. But not often,” he admitted. His fingers clutched to the worn fabric of a too baggy coat as the images flashed before his eyes. 

Memory for him was unlike that of most others. His memories did not fade. They were either lost completely to him or could be recalled as vividly as the moment they were created. 

It had been a century ago and yet he could still see the faces of the scientists crowding over him. Could still remember asking again and again what they were doing to him only to be brushed off or ignored entirely. His opinion had no worth to them. 

“I never knew if I was going to wake up as myself.. Never knew if I was the same person I was before their work was done..”

Arms tightened around him and he felt his eyes close. He found it difficult to focus on the bad memories when these new moments where so comforting. So warm and pleasant.  
“It’s over now..” Nick reminded him. “The Institute is long gone. They won’t be hurtin’ anyone from now on.”

He felt the head nod against his shoulder and turned to kiss his forehead lightly. 

“Y’know.. if you think it’d help.. I can ask my partner about their promise of replacing all your memories with images of cats?” he offered hoping the humour might make a difference.

A chuckle sounded, muffled slightly by his coat but when the head finally lifted he was pleased to see the pain in those grey eyes diminished and replaced with something softer. He could tell that DiMA was still shaken by the ordeal and this was unlikely to be a wound that ever healed but that didn’t mean he couldn’t try to stop the bleeding every once in a while. 

“As tempting as that may be, I think for now I would prefer a walk with some company.”

Nick smiled moving to release him with one arm, the other wrapping about his back. “Nothin’ like a stroll to air out the old data banks.”


End file.
